Interview by Mahdi Tanim
How do you feel after writing a poem (“Where You Stil Live“) about your emotions—blissful, relieved, sad?
I felt a deep sense of relief writing everything down. It was like releasing parts of me I wish could let go of, quieting the “what ifs” that lingered after the end of the relationship. Writing felt like I was going crazy with a purpose.
You mention rewriting memories in your poem—what does that mean for you personally?
I couldn’t let go of what I lost, but I also couldn’t see that losing it was a good thing, because I wasn’t being treated well. In the midst of my pain and inability to let go. Rewriting the memories became a coping mechanism, helping me to move on slowly, but efficiently.
Would you say the speaker in the poem is forgiving, still hurting, or both? Why?
I would say the speaker is both. She’s still hurting deeply, there’s grief in every word. The act of rewriting memories, holding on through ink, shows she hasn’t fully let go. But at the same time, there’s forgiveness, not necessarily for the person, but for herself. She’s forgiving herself for still caring, for not moving on as quickly as she wishes she could. The poem is a reflection of how complex healing really is and the mixed emotions that follows.
In the line “I erased all the noise, replaced it with silence”, why did you choose the word “‘silence”’ instead of something like “peace” or “quiet”? Does “silence” hold a deeper meaning for you, or did it just feel like the right word at the moment?”
I chose the word silence because it holds weight. Peace feels gentle and healing and quiet feels like it’s the end to everything, but silence can be heavy even haunting. Silence is what followed at the end, no closure, no answers, just absence. It wasn’t exactly peaceful but it was honest. It captured the emotional numbness that sometimes feels louder than any noise. “Silence” is the word that could hold the grief, the confusion and stillness all at once.
Read Neissa Jacques’ poem “Where You Still Live” here.
Neissa Jacques is a student at LaGuardia majoring in Creative writing. She writes poetry in her spare time and she hopes that one day she will be able to share her words with the world.
